07 July 2005

 

joy or happy abandon

i so often forget that i need to live my life with joy and happy abandon. and when i've forgotten for a while and then remember, that's the best. it's a new revelation. it's beautiful.

i yoga'd after work tonight. i almost skipped it. but i got there in time, so there i was. we did handstands. it was my first time. the world is completely different when it's upside down.

and the instructor said, this is a most auspicious evening! and whenever anyone uses the word auspicious, i'm hooked. i know i'm in the right place.

so it was good. and the park afterwards was perfect. it's like camping, except you don't have to stay the whole weekend. you can just go in the evening and see people walking their kids and dogs, and greet the white pines and the mallard ducks, and the flowing stream, and then move along.

i watched the cottonwood seeds float in the long gold rays of lazy sunlight. it was gorgeous. i was glad to be there. i want to go camping now. and i want to get my helix pierced. and tattoos. i want to workon my tattoo art. because nothing really matters. not my job, not my car, not my title. but it's the stuff outside that's important. the feeling alive. the going to rock concerts and getting tattoos and camping. this is real life.

i love real life. i just don't always remember to live it.

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